Little did she know….

She was born into struggle, carved from the rough hands of poverty and grief. Her mother died young, her father soon after, leaving her and her twin brother to fend for themselves. He was sent away to work as a yard boy for a wealthy family in Ocho Rios, while she was left behind to navigate a world that showed her no mercy. The older siblings had their own lives to figure out, and close family remained nothing more than a distant dream.

Music became her escape, the rhythm in her feet the only order life allowed her. But dreams don’t fill empty stomachs, and at fifteen, she found herself with child, a dark-skinned princess with a lapel of brown hair and a gap-toothed smile, features that softened the roundness of her young face. A daughter she could not keep. A child taken by family because she, too, was still just a girl. The father played hide and seek to the best of his abilities then one day, he hid and never came back to play. She knew she wanted to be with her first born but life had other plans.

Desperation led her to the bustling streets of Kingston, but the city offered no shelter, only sharper hunger and colder nights. Sleepless, starving, clinging to dreams that crumbled with every passing day. She sought comfort in the arms of men who saw her as nothing more than a fleeting indulgence, a body to own and discard. They struck her, used her, left her bruised and broken. Yet, she stayed because even pain felt better than nothing at all.

Then came another pregnancy. She named this one Crystal a stunning baby girl, no father in sight. Hunger gnawed at both mother and child, yet she held on, hoping, praying for something different. She was introduced to pain in the cruelest way and left with bruises that faded, but never healed, another man, another chance. A year later, she bore another daughter, Roxanne was the name given to her, a fragile child with large brown eyes and a straight nose. Three little ones now. No home. No love. No help. No hope.

The family who should have caught her let her fall. The men who whispered promises disappeared with the morning light. And yet, she endured. Because if life had taught her anything, it was how to survive. She had to fight for her girls. She had already borne them, but what was still to come would break her even further.

Written by:

Shaneika Smith